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Something I hold on to

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Assalamualaikum. :)

Hi. this time I'm going to write about something sensitive. I've been meaning to write about it for quite sometimes actually but then it is super sensitive and I'm afraid I'll hurt someone. I'm really really really sorry to those yang akan terasa, I don't mean to bash you or anyone. I just want to share something that I humbly hold on to since forever.

I get this a lot,

'ha tak pernah couple? why?'




cause I don't want to.

call me old fashion, but I truly prefer love after nikah.

Some thinks I'm delusional. They was like seriously, 'ingat sekarang ni zaman dulu-dulu ke?'.
some thinks I'm stupid cause 'kalau tak couple dulu mana nak tahu perangai die macam mana? entah2 dapat yang abusive.'
some thinks I'm choosy.
some thinks I'm bajet baik.

ha ha.

truthfully, I am afraid.

what if I'm delusional?
what if I'm stupid?
what if?

my future, it is still uncertain. I know for a fact that I'm turning 23 this year. no boyfriend. Nothing.

Everyone's worried.

thanks for your concern.

but I seriously don't want to pissed Allah off by doing something that he truly hates. menghampiri zina. I am not saying I'm perfect, there are many things that Allah instructed us not to do, i did it anyway and I'm not proud of it. but when it comes to the Z thing, something that involves maruah and all, I don't dare to disobey.

sorry for saying this but I think it is useless. every sweet talk you're having, every sweet things you do to each other, for what? you're still not blessed by Allah. you may gain the love of your partner but you make Him sad.

furthermore, if it is not bcos of religion pun, I prefer not to do something that's uncertain. i mean what assurance do you have stating that you're going to marry the one you're with now? kan?

if break pulak, It'll be weird. because you were once soo close, even closer that bestie, tiba-tiba break, bye bye. you dont know me i dont know you. A.W.K.W.A.R.D. I prefer to avoid all this awkwardness.

sensitive right? cause everyone's doing it now. I may not do it now, but in future, i dont know. i truly hope not. but if I do, please don't bash me kata cakap tak serupa bikin. what I write reflects what I currently believe.

I do have the desire to get married. I do. who doesnt? but if im going to be with one person for the rest of my life, I prefer the path leading to it, is the path blessed by Allah.

once again, to those who's offended with what and how I write, I am truly sorry. this is just my personal opinion. we all entitled to it including you.

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