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It's hard to be the one who leaves too

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Assalamualaikum. :)

I have always hate the sight of people leaving me................but this time, it was me. I am the one who leave.

When I dropped the bomb to my colleagues, their natural reaction were to ask why. I had replied them with all sort of answers. different answer to different individual. I hope they don't get together and discuss my departure because if they really do, my poor colleagues will think I deceived them or something. :D

but technically, I didn't lie. All of the answers that I give, all the reasons, they really do contribute to my departure from the program. but they weren't the deciding factor.

The deciding factor was when I started to feel, lethargic until it became,

'I don't want to wake up anymore'.

Nothing motivated me to wake up and I hate everything that I was doing at the moment.

Now to some of you, that might have been a childish reason to quit but to me, it's something serious. Something that requires me to do some soul searching.

Waking up, every morning, is a gift from Allah. Allah had chosen me, ME, to be his khalifah on this earth but how did I respond to that?

It's horrible, I know but it was what I felt. I tried to control it but it worsen day by day until I decided I had enough.

and that my friend, is how I made my decision. After all, I am widely known for putting my own happiness first before the rest. I am selfish that way. :D

Graduation googles

"The nostalgic feeling one has about a time or someone in their life when it is about the end, even if the time was completely miserable."

I had it. My colleagues weren't of any help either. One of my colleague even blurted out 'lepas ni dah tak de lah tirah,' 




I love all of them but if I ever going to do any surprise for anyone, I wouldn't organise it with them. They are the worst surprise party organiser ever! and they have loud voices too! I've heard too many 'eh tutup sikit nanti tirah nampak', I almost ask, 'hey guys, just include me in on the planning ok,'

Nevertheless, I still love all of you for being so sweet and cute. I sincerely hope the best for you, may you be blessed in everything you do and stay happy. :D


  1. Sames goes for me, maybe even worst. I hate meeting people coz i hate saying good byes. When i left the programme it was one of my happiest moments in my life, u shud be too :)

    I can really relate to ur post this time. When i resigned, i gave different reasons to different people which was all true, its just at that moment u tend to tell the truth and u realised that there r so many reasons which made u quit in the first place, so for me its not wrong at all. Hehe

    After this just search ur sole, inshallah u will find what u r looking for.

    Well, i tried to leave audit, but it wasn't meant to be. Hehe. Now I'm back, but more lesser work. As long as u r happy in what u do, u'll do fine, inshallah.

    All the best dear :)

    1. thank you for sharing! all these while I thought I was the only one. :D

      Same goes to you. May you find whatever you're looking for in life and make sure you're happy a long the way.

      'Happiness is not a destination, it is a way of life'.