High maintenance

Who?

Me!

***

Earlier this year, I was supposed to buy a house. In the beginning, I was excited. Purchasing a house is like the biggest thing ever and I am about to do it oh my I am officially an adult when did I grow up?! If you could see my pinterest, I have everything sorted out from bedroom, living room, kitchen everything! Did I mention the house has a yard? yard babeh yard! I've even planned what I would plant, what kind of flowers or trees, I have it all sorted out.

and then comes the financial stuff. -______-

I overestimated my savings and income. haha what else is new. At first I was like wth, just do this. If you think you can't afford this now what make you think you could afford this in future? Things become more expensive over time bla bla bla bla I decided to just book the house. The house is really a good deal considering it's square feet and all but even with that, I could barely afford the deposit. My saving is just enough to pay the deposit and after all that, I was left with nothing. Really nothing. On top of it, I now need to save for the miscellaneous cost i.e. lawyer fee, insurance bla bla bla.

This new lifestyle of mine, it affects me for one simple reason; I don't hardly save! I make plans. I am still an accountant by profession. I have my excel sheet on my monthly budgeting and stuff *flip tudung*...but I am also an impulsive buyer by nature *kepit balik tudung* I always have things to buy...like that cute top that is now on sale on Poplook, and that pleated skirt from LTD would go so well with that top but now I need that on sale Tefal standing steam iron to iron my pleated skirt and maybe I should buy a new dresser to make room for my new clothes. it's a neveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrr ending chain!

My motto when shopping is buy now, think later. If I am lucky (as in no mood to shop), I sometime managed to save some but don't worry, the very next month, I would surely overspent and when the time comes, I would "borrow" from my own saving. -____________-

and now, for the first time ever in my life, I don't have saving to "borrow" from. In addition, with new loan coming, I have to recalculate my monthly budget and after putting monthly home loan installment of RM1,900 on that budget, I am left with only RM600 to spend! That is like what, RM150 per week?!

I was nervous! I try to find ways to cut my expenses but it ain't easy. i.e. Do I really need my Spotify to be premium? Do I really need 20GB of mobile data? Do I need that full Astro subscription? It was a really stressful time! I mean, since when did I become so hard to maintain?! 

However, last week, the current owner decided to cancel the sale. He doesn't want to sell the house anymore! *sujud syukur* With my house agent I acted like I was angry/dissapointed with the whole situation when really, phewwh dodge a bullet =P

Allah helps me again, Alhamdulillah.

What I learn from this experience:

1. Before committing to anything, I should really really really think things through..I need to consider not only my income and expenses, I need to take my personality into factor to. Now it would be delusional to think that I would change anytime soon so try to accomodate those unexpected monthly expenses when doing budgeting.

2. I now realise my spending habit is at an alarming stage. I need to control myself more!

sigh

Assalamualaikum